Part 2: Highway to Hell

I made my way pretty easily back to the bus, we had to wait forever for some people to show up, and we gained some fans as people riding on the other buses organized by Stevan, couldn’t find theirs so ended up on ours. I’m up in the front row of seats, sitting in a row of three with what seemed like a relatively normal and friendly couple. One guy was Irish but a US resident, big US fan, HUGE anti-british fan (absolutely hated them) and his seemingly normal, but an obviously way intoxicated girlfriend.

For the first part of the ride home (exceedingly slow because of the bumper to bumper traffic) she was sleeping. Passed out probably a better term considering she was strangely, every 5-10 minutes or so moaning “ow ow ow” until she just stopped or readjusted how she was sleeping. Her boyfriend was being nice, trying to but a bag under her head to act as a pillow, trying to quiet her down. We stop at a gas station for a restroom/snack break, and she stumbles off, but returns to the bus pretty revived, I don’t know how she altered so quickly but she did. Then as were going along, her and her boyfriend start arguing, I don’t know about what, I was listening to my Ipod trying to sleep. Now her boyfriend is not being the bigger man, he’s antagonizing her a little bit, holding his own in the argument, but just being verbal. Eventually it gets to the point where people ask them to act their age and shut it. Well it doesn’t end and she starts hitting him and threatening to throw his passport out of the window.

It’s getting very strange at this point, she has bit him on the arm as he was reaching up to keep the window shut. She refuses to give him (an Irish citizen but American green card holder) his passport. I finally stop ignoring the two of them and actually sit between them at the encouragement of my other flustered bus mates. This lady continues to try and open the window, so now I’m having to hold it close, as well as the nice honeymooners sitting behind me. The boyfriend is not doing us any favors by trying to rally people to his side, but really not saying too much or anything offensive.

Then all hell breaks lose, This woman loses her damn mind. Screaming that she wants to be let off the bus. Mind you, we’re on a dangerous road leading into Johannesburg at nearly 2am, to let her out we might as well have pushed her off at full speed because most likely no one would of heard of her again. We refuse, by now the people at the front of the bus are all involved. She’s screaming, yelling, almost crying, and then she stumbles towards the front of the bus and starts yelling at the driver and his assistant, the guy selling snacks and drinks. There’s a gap where two other US fans are sitting, essentially on the steps of the bus and the engine cover, because there are not enough seats. These two have also got up trying to explain to her that we cannot and will not let her off the bus. Then she tries to grab the wheel of the bus from the driver, while we’re at full speed. We actually swerve a little, and half the bus that can see what’s going on are yelling their advice and the guys at the front grab and try to restrain this woman.

Then as we’re slowing down to pass through the toll booth, still screaming and crying, she manages to open the bus door. The guy standing in front of the door trying to prevent this legitimate nut job from doing anything of the type grabs her and starts to fall out the bus, luckily he also has a hand on the door and manages to stay on his feet, running backwards while the bus crawls away from the toll booth. Three guys jump forward pull the lady and the guy back into the bus and try and restrain this loon. By this point, some people seriously yell that we should leave her, and let her out. Enough listen to reason and say we just cant. Unfortunately, by now there are no cops to be found anywhere. The young man who nearly went out the bus with her, is trying to talk some sense into her, first restraining her and then try and reason with her. after a while it seems we have calmed her down….but this is not the case. The guy guarding the window looks down for a half second, and while the guy is talking to her, she suddenly grabs something from her bag, and flings it out the window! She claims it’s the man’s passport, we’re not sure. This lady has serious issues.

Very scary, especially because for a little bit, the driver was stopped and reversing down the interstate as we look out trying to see if it was his passport. We then decide, this is stupid, passports can be replaced, we need to get home. It’s already 2am. Luckily the young man at front managed to keep talking to her and eventually convince her, after some more crying, that we’re too close to Johannesburg, let’s just get back and then you can get off with everyone else. Praise the lord, we made it home safely, at 3am. My wonderful host Hilton, was nice enough to wake up and come pick me up at the god awful hour. He of course expected me 2 hrs earlier, but thanks to my cell phone, I was able to keep him updated of our progress via text. So, overall a great game, the night a little more eventful in the wrong way, but the game trumps it all.